Been wanting to post for a while but just..been lazy about it.

It's been a while since I've blogged but first,
HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY EVERYONE! <3
Recently my mum keeps asking me to dress up more, carry a bag and at least put on some lip colour.
Lol, I think I'm someone who likes to wear nice clothes but then really lazy to dress up. The clothes I wear out are..always the same few. As for a bag, still need to look somewhere. As for lip colour, I use tinted lip balm..weird thing is that last night, when my mum and I went for a walk she was saying how I should be getting a boyfriend now that I'm in uni..not long ago it was to stay away from this kind of things haha. Oh well, will trust that God will show me the right guy one day..

Anyway, what have I been doing for the past one and a half months?
I have basically been doing nothing..I mean I've tried looking for a part time job but then no one seems to be hiring atm..
Other than that, I got into pharmacy at monash uni and uni starts on the 27th of this month so about 2 weeks left. Then I have orientation next week for almost the whole week..I just hope I like it and my lessons don't start at 8 ><

A bit if fangirling here..so excuse me haha
Was scrolling about Facebook and then I saw A picture released officially by YG of Daesung. YG said he's going to spend the most effort on big bang's come back later this month and even their new group's debut had been postponed for their comeback. Read somewhere that all of their styles have undergone pretty drastic changes with TOP having blue hair and Daesung having blond hair. As usual GD wrote all the sings in their new album so, anticipating it's release on the 29th this month. They'll be having their 'Alive' concert soon after so..can't wait! Haha, meanwhile, no news about fahrenheit(all 4 of them..) waiting to watch the new series of KO One with only jiro in it I think..

Alright, I better get off now
Happy vday everyone!

Ok, so I've left Singapore at about 11.55am this morning, I'm now in Brunei, at Bandar Seri Bengawan Airport at the transit area with nothing much to do..
I'm in wuzun's hometown!!
hahahaha
Advice from me? Don't stopover so long here, or have a plan if your stopping over for a VERY LONG TIME. Stuck here for about 8hours..until 10pm tonight(was here since 2pm)..There isn't much to do here..apart from a few shops and coffee bean..
It's been quite an eventful visit to Singapore this time round. Will post about it sometime later.
That's all for now!

It's funny how I can't sleep in although I have all the time to do so :/
wake up, can't get to sleep, check around facebook and end up here.

Have not been in Singapore for THAT long(it's been about 4 days and 5 nights now) and already some singaporeans are really beyond belief and are just..disgusting. But first I must have a disclaimer. I'm not being racist because I'm Singaporean myself, born and raised here so I believe I have every right to say something? And it's not only one incident.

Believe it or not, I witnessed one in the first hour I touched down here. Was at some kopitiam at the airport waiting for my cousin and grandma's arrival. Was with my uncle and was drinking grass jelly and I heard this guy(About my age maybe?) Doesn't look like he's working and has a steady income but anyway, he was with an older lady, presumably his mum and throughout the time I was there waiting, his mum would say/ask something and he would just shout at her saying "SHUT UP LUH" or "WHATEVER JUST SHUT UP". Just because you're probably texting your friend? What kind of respect do you show. Who would you be now without your mother? You would be NOTHING to be honest. If you don't have a mother, who would clean up after you? Who will cook for you? Who will pass you money? I bet you're not even working, you're just a student and there you are shouting at your mum like she owes you something. If you didn't realise, you owe your life to her. The lack of basic respect is just astounding. Coming from the same generation as you, I'm ashamed. Yes, I'm ashamed of your behaviour not only because you did it in public.

Second incident was yesterday on the train. A lady carrying an infant walked onto the pretty crowded mrt. Did anyone give up their seat? NO. People, just because your seat doesn't say "reserved seat" doesn't mean you don't have to give up your seat. What's the point of being a first world country and having people who don't have grace OR courtesy to even ask if other people want a seat? All they did was just to pretend that they didn't see until this older lady gave up her seat. These moments you just feel ashamed to be singaporean.

Even in australia, sometimes you just feel SO ashamed to be from the same country.

We went to a koala conservatory centre when my cousin and grandma were there. We went to the toilet after and apparently, my grandma was queuing and some singaporeans just conveniently cut her queue. One woman even waited outside the toilet cubicle waiting to rush in. Since you are not in your own country, shouldn't you people at least learn how to behave properly? You're just showing how rude singaporeans are. As a person from Singapore, having a holiday overseas means your behaviour represents singaporeans. If this is how you want people to interpret Singaporeans behaviour then so be it.  

Last incident I'm going to write about was when we went to see caves(with my grandma and cousin). There was this singaporean family, kids(working generation) with their mother, so their mother wasn't as old as my grandma but still generally older. We were told not to touch any thing inside the caves(like the stalactites and stalagmites - go search them up if you don't know what I'm talking about). Anyway, we can't touch these because our skin secretes oil and these formations are created from the dripping of water droplets(yes, one by one) over millions of years(no exaggeration here). Any oil on these will repel the water and it will stop forming. Well, either because the mother didn't know or her kids didn't inform her, she touched things 3 times in the cave until I almost exploded. She touched a pool of water and 2 formations. HELLO NOT SUPPOSED TO TOUCH THANK YOU. For one, she touched the bottom surface of one so that's the end of that formation there. I have no idea why her kids didn't let her walk in front of them because they obviously didn't see anything and didn't tell her not to touch anything else. Why I didn't stop her? I saw her touching it from a distance. When she touched the last one the tour ended so it's not like I could tell her. She just ruined a natural formation so simple with a touch and I bet she doesn't even know about it up till now.

Singaporeans, just a reminder. Take note of your behaviour in public, especially overseas. People are watching and judging. The world's not only about you. Learn to care for other people and things for the future generations. Show some basic respect to your parents, they are the ones always there for you. You wouldn't be anything without them.

I'm so bored it's almost ridiculous..
I have nothing to do, amazingly, even on the computer. Just stuck on facebook all day with no one to stalk and no interesting news. Not like I can watch any videos because I don't have earpieces to listen, especially korean variety shows. Honestly, I didn't really love korean music, it didn't really appeal to me. Then I started listening to shinee, big bang and 2ne1. Love big bang's music, firstly because they write their own music and the tunes are catchy. Then I watched some shows and their interaction is sooo cute..really admire GD's ability to compose songs.
Want to start on sunshine angel and some other shows but uh..too lazy lolol
It's the weekend, nobody to go out with. Stuck at home with the computer but nothing to do online.
Really weird feeling. Wonder what I'm going to do for the whole of jan and feb..find a job? I also don't know..

Back in singapore. The humidity is killing me..actually need to live in air-con areas><
Did singapore become hotter or did melbourne just become colder..

My grandma is extremely angry that my dad booked a flight for me that has a stopover of 8hours in brunei.
She said that why save money and let a girl wait in a random country for 8hours. Honestly, I understand her reason for being angry but then she can't assume that we have that much money to just throw around everywhere. We don't have what we used to have. The fact that I have flown back twice is already a strain on our resources, and it's not like my future school fees are free. My dad isn't earning as much as he used to and now all the remainder of his salary goes into the house mortgage. My school fees, cost of plane tickets, spending money is all out of my dad's savings. We can't afford to throw money everywhere. Already when my cousin and grandma came over we spent how much money. Bringing them around etc. My dad also took a week's leave in total to bring them out. In total, I believe we spent more than half a thousand dollars. We can't afford to keep spending so much money. It would be nice if she can understand our financial position. In our family, me and david have learned not to ask for anything because we know it will have to come out of our savings. We now, are practically living on savings, and what are we going to do when we run out? Every time I go out I don't dare to spend money carelessly because every cent means something. I can understand that she is very 不放心 and all I ask is that she understands our financial position. She says she wants to scold my dad the next time he calls but seriously, as long as I stay in the airport I'm pretty safe-.- If wuzun can walk around Brunei freely, why can't I walk around the airport? Plane tickets aren't that cheap. Just hope she doesn't actually call my dad and "scold" him..
Now I feel bad for even mentioning the stopover at Brunei to my uncle and then he had to tell my grandma-.- Not that I'm complaining but she didn't really have to know..

..
Cleaning the house is crazy-.-
My mum has a fetish for big heavy vacuum cleaners because they can steam mop and vacuum at the same time. Sounds very high-tech but each of these vacuum cleaners weigh about 17kg. So imagine you lugging a 17kg vacuum cleaner just to clean the house. That's like carrying a child and running a few rounds in your house. First heavy vacuum cleaner? Osim iEcologi. I think it's about 17kg as well. Then the steam function had to die. And my mum, having enough of Australia's lack of steam mop/vacuum cleaners, decided to get ANOTHER FREAKING OSIM VACUUM CLEANER, called the uEcologi.

Dear Osim,
Yes, the idea and technology of putting both the steam mop and vacuum cleaner into one device is very attractive but can you also PLEASE TAKE INTO ACCOUNT OF THE WEIGHT YOU HAVE TO LUG AROUND YOUR HOUSE?!! Yes it's convenient but the weight just puts you off having anything to do with it.

Finished vacuuming the living room and my room and already starting to pant. Partly because my stamina decreased but also because that vacuum cleaner is SOOOO heavy ok.

Right now, we also have no water because my dad cut off the water supply to change the pipes. So currently we can't wash anything, can't go toilet, can't bathe etc.
AND it looks like it's going to rain so we may have no water for the rest of today and even tonight..Shower in the rain? lol..

hahhaa yes! I caught the 11/11/11 11.11pm! lolol, I've become..even more childish-.-
it's been a while, half my exam's over. Still have chem and chinese to go..
I think I screwed my maths): ohwell, have to compensate with chem and chinese.

attempting to catch the 11.11pm of 11/11/11! <3
yes, go count how '1's there are! hahhh :D

ok, considering my first VCE paper is tomorrow, I shouldn't even be online but uh, I saw this on facebook on because I'm trying to keep off facebook I will not share it for now but post it here.

"THE (SCIENTIFIC) DEATH OF JESUS
For the next 60 seconds, set aside whatever
You're doing and take this opportunity! Let's see if Satan
Can stop this.

... ... ... ... THE
(SCIENTIFIC) DEATH OF JESUS

At the age of 33,
Jesus was condemned to death .

At the time
Crucifixion was the "worst" death. Only the worst
Criminals were condemned to be crucified. Yet it was
Even more dreadful for Jesus, unlike
Other criminals condemned to death by
Crucifixion Jesus was to be nailed to the
Cross by His hands and feet.

Each nail
Was 6 to 8 inches long.

The nails
Were driven into His wrist. Not
Into His palms as is commonly
Portrayed. There's a tendon in the wrist that
Extends to the shoulder. The Roman guards knew
That when the nails were being hammered into the
Wrist that tendon would tear and
Break, forcing Jesus to use His back
Muscles to support himself so that He could
Breath.

Both of His feet
Were nailed together. Thus He was forced to
Support Himself on the single nail that
Impaled His feet to the cross. Jesus could
Not support himself with His legs because of the pain
So He was forced to alternate between arching His
Back then using his legs just to continue to
Breath. Imagine the struggle, the pain, the
Suffering, the courage.

Jesus endured this
Reality for over 3 hours.

Yes,
Over 3 hours! Can you imagine this kind of
Suffering? A few minutes before He died,
Jesus stopped bleeding. He was simply pouring water
From his wounds.

From common images
We see wounds to His hands and feet and even the spear wound
To His side... But do we realize His wounds
Were actually made in his body. A hammer
Driving large nails through the wrist, the feet overlapped
And an even large nail hammered through the arches, then a
Roman guard piercing His side with a spear. But
Before the nails and the spear Jesus was whipped and
Beaten. The whipping was so severe that it tore the
Flesh from His body. The beating so horrific that His
Face was torn and his beard ripped from His face. The
Crown of thorns cut deeply into His scalp. Most men
Would not have survived this torture.

"

He had no more blood
To bleed out, only water poured from His
Wounds.
The human adult body contains about 3.5 liters
(just less than a gallon) of blood.

Jesus poured all 3.5
Liters of his blood; He had three nails hammered into His
Members; a crown of thorns on His head and, beyond
That, a Roman soldier who stabbed a spear into His
Chest..

All these without
Mentioning the humiliation He suffered after carrying His own
Cross for almost 2 kilometers, while the crowd spat in his
Face and threw stones (the cross was almost 30 kg of weight,
Only for its higher part, where His hands were
Nailed).

Jesus had
To endure this experience, to open the
Gates of Heaven,
So that you can have free
Access to God.

So that your sins
Could be "washed" away. All of them, with no exception!
Don't ignore this situation.

JESUS
CHRIST DIED FOR YOU!

He died for you! It
Is easy to pass jokes or foolish photos by e-mail, but
When it comes to God, sometimes you feel ashamed to forward
To others because you are worried of what they may think
About you.

God
Has plans for you, show all your friends what He experienced
To save you. Now think about this! May God bless your
Life!

60
Seconds with God...

For the next 60
Seconds, set aside what you're doing and take
This opportunity! Let's see if Satan can stop
This.

All you have to do
Is:

1. Simply
Pray for the person who sent this message to
You:

2.Then, send this
Message to people.. The more the better.

3. People will
Pray for you and you will make that many people pray to God
For other people.

4. Take a
Moment to appreciate the power of God in your life, for
Doing what pleases Him.

If you are not
Ashamed to do this, please, follow Jesus' instructions.
He said (Matthew 10:32 & 33): "Everyone therefore
Who acknowledges me before others, I also will acknowledge
before My Father in heaven; but whosoever denies Me
before others, I will deny before my Father in heaven." 

You may have realised I changed my blogskin.
Been wanting to change it for a veryyyyy long time but then blogskins.com refuses to let me search any key words so I have to rely on the "tags" on the blogskins. I actually changed to another one that was pink but uh, I couldn't really match the colour of the tagboard and the blogskin so I just kinda gave up-.- it was quite a nice one though :/ the pictures on it were nice. But then there were quite a few restrictions on the size/length of some things like the tagboard and links so..decided to change it to another one. Another one that is easier to match the tagboard to and also has the cool one-picture-a-post thing. I actually changed the title of the blogskin and the big word on top so..
I've been using "wish upon a star" for AGES but then I don't have creativity and haven't come up with anything else yet so, will have to stick with it for now. It may make me sound like a daydreamy kind of person but uh, I'm not really like that ok. I just realised something wrong with the date and time-.- the year and the time joins together and looks like some futuristic number/year of the future-.-
I really like the picture that comes with every post hahahah anyone free to look for nice blogskins like that for me? :D
A downside though, is that the font is TINY. All of the blogskins I see have tiny font and it's normal-sized. I know we're young and stuff but seriously-.- the size is like ants crawling on my screen.
AND I realised the "memory" part is getting longer and longer! o.0 It used to be so short haha
It's the longest I've ever had a blog so, an achievement? Alright, I should be going hahahha
Sorry for my temporary obsession with dandelions><

Shall continue my update on yesterday because I realised there were some things I missed out on.
Well, after the ceremony and we left the hall there is this tradition of running out of the school by the driveway with other students waving blue and white balloons(school colours), the "final exit" from school. Anyway, it was raining and so we ran super fast then walked back into school by the back carpark for the accomodation(food and drinks). There was also the valedictory dinner last night but I didn't go. Too expensive hhaha..but whatever, not going to pay $85 for a 3 course dinner at the botanic gardens-.-

ahahha, just felt I had to blog because some random woman called and it was..quite funny
woman: hi, how're you today?
me: good?!! (how awkward would it be if I said terrible hahahah)
woman: that's good, (and then she begins talking about I don't know what-.- with a word complimentary in her sentence)
me: what?! (her background was quite noisy)
woman: I'm inviting you to a complimentary meal next week!!
me: oh, where? (I meant to ask where I should be going to have the complimentary meal)
woman: A COMPLIMENTARY MEAL!! (and she was actually shouting into the phone by now-.-)
anyway, we ended the convo with her hanging up hahahhaha so funny><
I'm not deaf woman-.- I was going to specify my question and you just cut in so of course now it seems like you're talking to some deaf old woman-.-
First of all, please cut that CRAZY AUSTRALIAN ACCENT, normally I would understand that but your accent was just...
AND, please CALL IN A QUIET PLACE-.-
Don't scream into the phone, I can tell, thankyou.

ohlol, so funny how these advertisement people who call you always have funny accents and speak in a ridiculously fast pace-.- I didn't even catch a single word. Especially those Australians that call and talk in the super thick Australian accent and speaks like a bullet train. Dude, you want to be heard/understood, talk slower thanks. No one's going to get what you're saying if you talk at 1000000mph=.= Somehow all these people have really thick accents and after they've said hi you're actually like WHATT SAY YOU?!! Got called by another person once, an Indian lady, called a couple of times actually and I think she gave up HHAHAHAHAH sorry just so funny I have to share.

woman: Hi, how're you today? (their favourite greeting)
me: uh..good
woman: do you have a bank loan for your house? If so which bank? and how much?
me: uh, I'm not sure
woman: You don't have to disclose any personal information. (lol and she asked how much-.-)
me: uh, I'm not the owner of the house, I'm not sure of any bank loan.
woman: It's ok, do you have a bank loan? (IS SHE ON REPLAY OR WHAT-.-)
-facepalm- and then I just put down the phone hhahahahha
so ridiculous and funny LOL...ah, these people. Make me feel like an idiot talking to them but then after thinking about it, it's so funny hahahhaha XD

News of the day: I HAVE GRADUATED OFFICIALLY FROM HIGH SCHOOL

Last day of being 16.
Am I the only who doesn't want to grow up?
So many responsibilities, being mature etc.
and I don't know why but I don't like mentioning my birthday in melb.
I just don't want people to know I'm that much younger I guess...especially that one person.
I must NOT lose out to you.
Birthdays seem like such a big thing over here it's weird.
They have birthday parties/dinners every birthday..a bigger 18th and a very big 21st.
The last birthday party I had was when I was 12..the first birthday that is after exams in the period of primary school. Because PSLE ends earlier than normal school exams so my birthday falls in the week of PSLE marking week. Yes, it used to be a week and I believe now it's a few days. And then since then, my birthday has always been around exam period..even here-.-
I just want to..stay 16 forever hahahhaha (tells self to dream on)
I'm going to graduate next monday 24 oct. I still remember thinking in primary 4, how many more years I had to study before even going to uni and realising I had more than 10 years to go. I'm already halfway there. So soooon, don't even know what I want to do in uni. Sometimes, I really wonder if it was the right decision to skip a year..it's not like I can beat a rgs girl that is one year older(already, rgs already better than me but also one year older?!!) and not only that but also other smarttt people/hardworking people. Was doing maths and I realised how much work that needs to be done and it's taking me sooo long to do just 1 practice paper and that's only paper 2..there's still paper 1.
Tomorrow is the last day we're officially in school uniform, having lessons. thursday, friday dress-up, monday dress-up then change back to school uniform for my last assembly(leavers service) ever...last church service tmr too..all the 'last' stuff keeps coming up everywhere. I'm not sure I'm that happy to finally graduate. I don't even know what I want to do with my life. I just realised how hard it is to score that well..and me? sadly, is far far away from that target.
Screwed my chem sac on monday. So hard): And I probably made like a million careless mistakes as I always do...
Anyway, I guess this is the end of my 感言 as a 16-year-old.
Actually technically, I was born 4++pm singapore time 19 oct but Australia time is 7++ so I have...less than 24 hours still o.0

without realising it, today's wuzun's birthday!!
First birthday after being separated from fahrenheit):
it's really late now, I should be going><

“No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don’t want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life’s change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true.

Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”

—Steve Jobs


Know who Steve Jobs is? The co-founder of Apple. 

“ When does a man die? When he is hit by a bullet? No. When he suffers a disease? No. When he ate a soup made out of a poisonous mushroom? No! A man dies when he is forgotten! ” -Steve Jobs


After facing pancreatic cancer for 7 years, he passed away this morning at the age of 56.
It is the very same cancer wuzun's mum had. 


I guess when you're facing Death like this, you don't think so much about how much longer you have to live, it's more about making every day count. Making every day meaningful because one day, all this will pass, one day, everyone will die. No one is going to live forever and what's the point of slogging your whole life and regretting  your whole life when you're done? 


Right now, facebook and probably other networking sites are flooding with RIPs Steve Jobs, all mostly from his creation, apple devices. This is how many people he has impacted with his creation. Indeed, we do owe him many thanks for his contribution and inspiration to this generation. So, thankyou for what you've done for this generation. You will be remembered, Father of Apple. 

Just a really quick one.
Finally, the wait is over! Into the sixth year now I believe and they called today to confirm. Thank you God for looking out for us and performing this miracle.
It's been 5 full years and a bit and the realisation that it's over...
so relieved, so thankful.

it's been raining like crazy today..and it was 25 degrees yesterday..
It's supposed to be spring-.-
But how come we're like back to winter again? >.<
Just realised howww much more work I have to do and sooo little time to do. Chem exam papers, methods exam papers, further exam papers. And I am super unprepared for the maths stuff..
chinese is only so-so
english is...my essays are getting shorter and shorter
and then that's it. So basically...I'm prepared for NONE OF MY SUBJECTSS!!
die..better go do some work..

...so dead...
零时抱佛脚是件不好的现象，千万不要学>.<
not even kidding...memorising my general convo is just...:O
and I'm only on page 3..
3.5 half pages to go and it's already 10.06pm...looks like I'll be sleeping really late tonight):

hm..shall just casually post since I'm already logged in...

sometimes, I'm just so clueless as to what my mum wants me to do.
When I'm not studying, she wants me to study.
When I'm studying she asks me to do this and that(mainly housework).
So uh, do you want me to study or what?!
Hello, you're not the only person busy with assignments to finish. Mind you, I'm the one taking vce this year. I'm the one that's studying to go to uni next year...

intense mugging for the next month and a half or so...well, 6 weeks to be exact. So little time, so much to do. I better get working!

shall do a really quick one...actually I'm just complaining about my life LOL
really tired, I have no idea what I'm doing right now
All I know is I MUST FOCUS
I think I will actually stick the word 'FOCUS' somewhere in my room..
Concentration means so much, competition is everything, doing well then of course, is a must.
Have to start getting a move on, got to start printing exam papers, got to start doing maths like crazy etc.
It just hit me that there's 7 weeks to exams including this week and there's millions of papers waiting to be done, so many maths questions waiting to be completed, chinese general convo and detail study to prepare for. In conclusion, I shouldn't even BE online-.-
goodnight world!(:

10 years on....it's the 10th anniversary of 911 (US time)
It's a tragedy that shook the world. The news was replayed and replayed...I still remember wondering what was happening in primary 1..
10 year on..I'm now turning 17...
time passes fast
but it takes a long time to heal.
It is hard to forgive, hard to forget.
I pray for peace to be endowed upon those affected by 911. God, may they feel comforted and touched by your love. In Jesus name, Amen.

I think this will probably be one of the last posts(or maybe the last actually) before vce examss...although it starts in november...the amount of work I need to do has just dawned upon and I finally 领悟了 and so basically, I will...be temporarily be going on a internet hiatus most likely by the end of this month. But before that I have to blog :D so here goes...

Prayer is basically the way you connect and maintain a relationship with God. Honestly, sometimes it's really hard to pray to a God you've never been able to see, and sometimes you just feel He isn't there, like He isn't listening. Has it ever occurred to you that He's remaining silent on purpose? Prayer to me, should be said from the heart and not pre-arranged speeches. I find it difficult to say "Dear Lord..." in that flat monotone voice because it isn't from my heart. How do you actually pray without meaning it. It is like 口是心非, you don't mean what you're saying then what's the point of saying? If you don't praise with all your heart and mean it then what's your purpose of praying...it just seems like a show, a meaningless show for people to watch. My primary school teachers used to tell us that if we don't study and pray to God to help us do well, He can't help us...which is sort of true in that sense. I guess God keeps from you what He thinks you shouldn't have or gives you things you deserve. It's reasonable in the way that you don't get everything you pray for then God's purpose would become your genie literally, to grant your every wish-.- His silence sometimes, I guess is also a small test of faith. By praying for more faith, your are just asking for more trials to test your faith, but then your faith will be strengthened :D

sorry>.< I ran out of content...shall blog again soon(:

I was just thinking, why does God make us wait?
And I think it's not only because God has His own plan for us, but also if we always get what we want quickly, wouldn't we view God as being at our beck and call?
Think of it this way. If I pray for something to happen and it happens the next day, and it always happens this way, I think I would take it for granted that God would grant me whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted it. God would be just a God that makes my wishes come true but I don't think He wants to be seen that way. He is the mighty God, the God who saves, will He tolerate such treatment? Similarly, it's like spoiling a child with materialistic wealth. A child may wish for something and his/her parents wanting to make their kid happy gets the thing for the child. I think God wants to share a relationship that is much closer than that of a Father who gives presents and gifts whenever we please. That is a really materialistic kind of relationship that can't compare to real kinship that a father may have with his kids. Also, I think waiting also in a way nurtures your faith. If you always get what you want, it's very shallow faith and relationship because then, you have faith for the reaping of materialistic wealth. After a long time, it is common to feel impatient and even abandoned, but then if you are able to hang on until God helps, it shows that your faith has the power to help you hang on to God, and the faith that God will perform miracles and help you.

Humans always tend to turn to God when in need or in trouble but forget about Him when life is all good and happy. It's hard to not be like that because in a way, I guess, it's sort of human nature. You can't help what's going to happen, but I think it's most important to thank Him every day for his provisions, for having a safe and settled life every day.

Give thanks, with a grateful heart
Give thanks to the Holy One

have been wanting to change blogskin for a while now but then blogskins.com search engine always isn't working for me. So I shall just have to stick with the current one :/
Someone's going nuts in his own room for no apparent reason. Yes just insult and call me names when all I did was leave the key in the door UNLOCKED. I didn't even say anything to you when you got back like dude seriously? Who do you think you are. All the eff words and I'm wondering how old you actually are DUDE YOU'RE NOT EVEN 12!! What is the world coming to? Lower primary school kids have phones that are touch screen/slide etc. P6 boy having his own iPod touch?!!technological revolution.

My earphones died T.T both sides totally no sound. I went back to using the original one that came with the mp3 but that one the left side has already died so left the right side only. 3-4 sets of earphones died within 3-4years is that bad? About 1 set each year. Most of them is because the left side no sound the one that just got spoilt is the first one that both sides have totally zero sound. Went to look up if I can fix it but uh...apparently you can but it's not easy, might as well get another one-.- There are some people whose earphones spoil once every 3-4 months-.- Have no idea what they do with their earphones-.-

Anywayy, it's free dress day tomorrow! :D And there's band tmr morning too! I love band o.0 although it's so tiring to wake up so early(although in singapore I always woke up at that time every single day). To other people band is a burden but I enjoy it...lol performance in 3 weeks!! :O I have a solo ;) It's actually an oboe solo but the oboe girl doesn't want to play it-.- As if you don't want your solo!! And it's not like it's very hard but uh...really thankful for the solo then? I think it's one of the last performances EVER so it's like a perfect ending I guess, for me that is.  Dedication is not easy I guess, that's why not many people come on time...

ok I really should go now...need to go study more probability and memorise my chinese detail study(oral) stuff>.< update another time

Recently, the topic of forgiveness has been popping up everywhere, last Sunday's sermon, Monday school assembly, today chaplain's assembly.
Is God trying to tell me to forgive someone? Or is He asking me to pass on the message to somebody? Shall share some points from Sunday's sermon.

Forgiving isn't forgetting. The phrase "forgive and forget" is almost impossible to achieve. When you're hurt, it not very possible or likely that you'll totally forget that incident. Forgiving is starting the healing process of the heart. By thirsting for revenge just stops that healing process and at the same time, implying to God that you don't need his control and you can settle all this yourself. Forgiving isn't easy and I know that from experience. People have hurt me and after a while, I learnt to let go. Put the matter into God's hands and He will solve the problem for you. He is always in control and will never forsake you. It is a matter of whether or not you believe and have faith in Him to be in control and solve your problems.

Forgiving doesn't also mean a relationship. Some people will just hurt you over and over again. There's no point in continuing being related to them. A relationship needs both parties to work for it. If the other party isn't willing, you're just wasting your time and you'll just get hurt over and over again.

Because we are forgiven, we should forgive. Break the cycle of revenge and spread God's love, the essence of christianity. Trust that He knows and He heals. There is a parable in the bible in which a lord showed mercy and forgave his servant who did not return his money on time when the servant pleaded with him. That same servant then went to another servant who owed him money. When the debtor pleaded with the creditor, that creditor who was pardoned did not show mercy and threw the debtor servant into jail until he returned every single cent. When the other servants heard of this, they went to the master and told him. The master then called the servant he had pardoned and reprimanded him for not showing mercy that he was shown. That servant was thrown into jail and tortured until every cent was returned. In the same way, show God's grace that He has shown to you.

Today, during mustard, we were also talking about why bad things happen on Earth. Bad things is an understatement but I have no idea what other words I should use. There isn't a why doesn't God send us this and provide us with that. I don't think that there's such things as "God, I want rain, please send rain". I believe He has reasons for all His doings and sometimes these catastrophes are caused by the devil to rock your faith. In the same way, God may use these catastrophes to save people and let the victims grow deeper in faith. I listened to a sermon a while back and the preacher said "It's not that God provides rich people with all their money and possessions, if it's that way, God is being unfair and why would He do that? It just happened that you're born in the right time in the right environment, in the right place." I guess it's sort of true because why would God provide so much for one person and not so much for another? But in times of trouble, in times of need, it's sometimes really hard to turn your eyes to God, especially when you've been waiting. I, for one am so familiar with this waiting. My family's been waiting for the 6th year now. But I believe God is moving. Situation has improved and I trust that God will take care of us and solve the problem. It hasn't been easy and many times, my parents have asked God, "How long more do we have to wait?". Waiting is difficult and sometimes you just want to give up. You just have to have the faith that God will do a miracle and solve whatever problems you have. Trust that God knows best and He'll love you and will always be there for you no matter what.
Hope anyone who reads this feels encouraged to continue through your hardship! ♥

Forgive me for saying so but don't you think you're soooo ridiculously unreasonable?
cooking the rice 10 minutes later won't kill you. Just because David needs to get out by 5.30 doesn't mean I have to cook rice in blazer and jumper. ARE YOU AWARE THAT ALL THE CLOTHES I'M WEARING ARE LONG SLEEVED AND ISN'T VERY CONVENIENT TO WASH RICE? Does it matter to you that I'm feeling sick? It's not like I want to be but hello? can't even change clothes first isit? Yes, go on insulting me. It's not my fault David has to get out by 5.30. I'm not the one who signed him up for lacrosse. I'm not the person who introduced him to lacrosse and it's my fault the hole puncher disappeared? And it's also my fault david can't find the stupid pack of raisins that was supposed to be in the pantry but WASN'T? Can't you just admit you're wrong instead of saying WHATEVER? Yes, I owe my life to you but then be a bit more reasonable can-.- everything also my fault when we're rushing for David. Yes, totally..

It's NATIONAL DAY!! :D


Funny how we feel more patriotic overseas. I was never the really crazy enthusiastic patriot in singapore, not saying that I am one now. Still remember singing 'Home' super loud in P6 with Ruth and Winnie. Don't know how are they right now. It's been 5 years already!! I just found Winnie's facebook :O don't know if she still remembers me or not, but just add anyway :D

Anyway, back to the topic of national day. For  a government to have a nation with national pride is not easy. Recently the inflating influx of foreigners mainly scholars and expats haven't exactly made singaporeans jump with joy. The US economy downturn isn't going to help the economic situation either. But I think it's a long way that Singapore as a country, a nation has come. Today celebrates the 46th year of independence, the 46th anniversary of LKY's achievement in the history of Singapore. I'm not a supporter of any political group but the fact that LKY helped achieve Singapore's independence will not be changed. The fact that he once loved Singapore THAT much(I have no idea about his love now though) and the fact that Singapore has come this far. We came from a generation of poor immigrants, seeking the hope of a better life. Look where Singapore stands now. It's too crowded but at the same time the modern city is it's image. Singapore has moved from literally a kampong to a city. Although there're so many people and it's really overcrowded, public transport is just PACKED, construction of the new train line going on in various areas, in a way, everything is progressing.

To me, singapore is still my home. My home with all my friends and relatives, all my memories, my childhood. There are some people who I'm so thankful to God that I met. People who stood by me, quarreled but made up. Honest statement from me, if you can have a big quarrel with your friend and still end up as good friends, it shows that they treasure that friendship as much as you and your friendship will be even stronger. Singapore is where all my memories lie and there it shall stay.

Home
Whenever I am feeling low
I look around me and I know
There's a place that will stay within me
Wherever I may choose to go
I will always recall the city
Know every street and shore
Sail down the river which brings us life
Winding through my Singapore

This is home truly, where I know I must be
Where my dreams wait for me, where the river always flows
This is home surely, as my senses tell me
This is where I won't be alone, for this is where I know it's home

When there are troubles to go through
We'll find a way to start anew
There is comfort in the knowledge
That home's about its people too
So we'll build our dreams together
Just like we've done before
Just like the river which brings us life
There'll always be Singapore

For this is where I know it's home
For this is where I know I'm home


It's been so long but this is still my favourite ndp song. (On the topic of ndp songs, the new versions are so....it ruins the meaning of the song. BRING BACK THE ORIGINAL VERSIONS!! :D)
家

Was going to memorise the first page of my detail study but uh, doesn't work. I think I memorise these things best in my room or on the train.
Really tired and sleepy although I slept earlier than usual yesterday. Feel like just going home to sleep somemore-.-
Got chem midyear results yesterday. The result's ok but not exactly jumping with joy about it. The percentage of boys compared to girls who got A+ is so different.
This week is pretty relaxed compared to last week. Chinese teacher is on camp, no tests/sac this week! But then I still need to memorise the first page of my detail study. I have no idea how I'm going to remember any of it. I think at most I'll get through to half the page.
I think I've lost my motivation to study this week. I've been putting of studying probability since last week. Should probably start soon...

Some people just don't know when to stop. They don't know when enough is enough. They just keep going on and on, assuming everyone has to talk to them, assuming they know everything, assuming that they're the boss. People who constantly say "you're a genius, I should be the one who should be worried", just STAY AWAY FROM ME. Stop talking like you know me so well. You don't. Just stop. Enough is enough. I just wanted to make a friend, and you? You just have to go on and on about how your studies arne't that good. If you're trying to praise me, you're doing it wrong. I know I'm not a genius. I'm not the type of kid that doesn't study and still gets full marks on a test or anything like that. I can study and still fall short of the full mark by a lot. Know your place and stop saying things like that. I don't like how you ask me how's my day and this sac and that sac EVERY SINGLE DAY AFTER SCHOOL. This just screams one word - "DESPERATION". Leave me alone ok? I'm not interested, will never be. At first I thought you were just being friendly, now I just want you to disappear. Stop asking me every single thing that's going on in my life. If I want to tell you, I'll tell you. Stop asking. I don't need to tell you anything, don't need to reply your messages, don't need to carry out small talk with you. If I want to talk to you, I will, just stop everything you're doing now, go and study and leave me alone! After not replying you since last thursday, do you not know how to take the hint to stop-.- I'm talking to you because I'm nice ok? I'm not interested in you, full stop, period. No one else talks to you because you're just so...I don't know, naggy? I have no idea how to describe it or even to respond. I'm being nice because I just think it's mean to ignore people like that but it's too much, I don't feel like being the nice person to you anymore.

200th post! :D
longest blog I've ever kept, although I'm not that faithfully updating and no one comes to read anyway.
everyone's doing their own thing, I'm doing my own.
SO BOREDDD
school is so boring, everything is so boring
I live just for the days,
live day by day, solving problems day by day
no future plan.


觉得可惜，觉得遗憾，觉得失落
虽然以前的中文水平不是那么的高，现在好像变更低了。好不甘心。
做detail study后的一些感想还要写说这提高了我的中文水平。明明就没有，为什么一定要这样说呢？我的中文水平本来就比现在的程度高，现在还要装说这对我很有帮助，为何要这样说？以前中文对我来说很难，但是现在其实满怀念的。真想不到以前一个半小时就把700－800个字的作文写完，现在却在写250字的作文，一切不如从前。
很怀念也很想念，依旧。
Australia' chinese oral examination is not even a test of oral skills on how fluent you are or how accurate you are. Bluntly said, IT'S A WASTE OF TIME. You want to test standard, test reading not MEMORISING. Chinese oral here is PURE MEMORISING. Hello? This is oral not a test of memorisation skills-.- Who can remember a total of almost 10 pages full of words for examiners to ask less than half of those questions?! ridiculous.
but then again, it's good that I left. I don't think I can continue in that kind of environment, juggling cca, school work, test, tuition etc. We aren't made of steel-.-
ohwell, end of rant.

melbourne's weather is going crazy again-.-
last week was so nice and warm and sunny and then it has to rain today
which means the coming week is going to be COLD. -sigh-
I used to complaing about how hot singapore was but I think having a stable weather condition is better than having weather that plays jokes on you and is so TEMPERAMENTAL-.- seriously. I rains for like 5 minutes, stops and THE SUN COMES OUT. Really hard to gauge when to wash the clothes because when the sun comes out, you bring the clothes out to dry.  After bringing all the clothes out, a grey cloud floats into vicinity and it's going to rain-.- so many times already!

好想停留在这个时刻。
从未成熟到现在的我，长大得好快。
转眼间已经是在读最后一年了。
从来没有想过要赶快长大，可是现在渐渐成长就好想要停止时间。
从不想到这里来，却开始喜欢这里的读书环境。
放弃了很多，得到了也很多。
我遇见的朋友，我都很珍惜。
很羡慕弟弟还在长高的状态，哪像我，没有再长高了。

ohman, why am I so reflective today>.<
is it because VCE's only 3 months away now?
the time to make the most important decision in my life is around the corner.
This term's a flurry. Week after week, it seems like a mundane routine but then each week brings us one week closer to the last year of high school. Never thought this would be so soon. I still remember thinking how old people in JC were, and now I'm here myself, I can't believe I'm this age. I can't believe I'm going to uni next year. I can't believe everything that's happening now in fact. I think I've changed a lot ever since I came here. I don't know in what way but I just have. When I went back to singapore, it felt like I just continued where I left off/of(?) It's just like my time in singapore was on pause and started to continue playing when I went back to visit, and now it's on pause again. People I know, enlisting soon, others going to uni already...

Finally am almost done with detail study. It's been taking up so much time to find information and then answer questions, edit answers etc. Now I just mainly left the questions on why I chose this topic and what I learnt from this topic.
Honestly, I have no idea what I learnt from Zhenghe's expeditions. I first knew him through my chinese textbook in primary school talking about how he travelled to the West Sea and gave all the expensive jewels etc. to other countries. I don't recall any motive being mentioned or what they were trying to achieve through his expeditions. Well, in a way, I did learn a lot more about Zhenghe and the whole situation of his maritime exploration. He actually made it all the way to East Africa, which is a major feat itself, and his treasure fleet consisted of ships larger to Columbus ships. He traded with many different countries and got other countries to pay tribute to China, in a way expanding the empire. But what did I learn from this event? Perseverance? Patience? Planning of journey?

my phone is so inactive it's just crazy..I used to send about 15-20sms a day last time because I got 10 free when I sent 5. Now? 1 message is so expensive, 1 call costs just $1.17 to hear the phone ring whether or not the person picks up. Going out just costs too much like eating etc. I live like a hermit-.-